The Warm-Up: Un-Spursy Spurs; terrible keeper is great; Shake Sack
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Updated 18/10/2017 at 08:01 GMT
Plus: Cristiano Ronaldo singing the Champions League anthem, and Kevin De Bruyne's high-pitched yelp.
Harry Kane of Tottenham Hotspur shoots and Raphael Varane of Real Madrid deflects his shot into the net for Tottenham Hotspur first goal during the UEFA Champions League group H match between Real Madrid and Tottenham Hotspur at Estadio Santiago Bernabeu
Image credit: Getty Images
WEDNESDAY'S BIG STORIES
That dreadful Brazilian keeper might actually be good
Don't you hate it when Pep Guardiola knows more about football than you?
Yeah, Pep Guardiola - with his decade of experience managing Europe's elite clubs, his six league titles and two Champions League.
When Guardiola replaced ghost goalie Claudio Bravo by spending £35m on an uncapped Brazilian from Benfica, we rubbed our hands expectantly, sat back and waited for hilarity to ensue.
Ederson duly made a massive rick in a pre-season game against Manchester United - embarrassing!
How could City, with their army of scouts and world-leading player recruitment team hope to defy the immutable natural law that Brazilian keepers are ALWAYS dodgy?
Well - turns out Pep and City might have known what they were doing.
Goalkeeping traditionalists spent last season decrying concepts like distribution and command of area if they came at the expense of actually saving shots (somehow imagining Guardiola was completely fine with the sieve-like Bravo) - this season Ederson has shown that stopping the ball need not come at the expense of football ability.
Spurs: Not Spursy
The first time the Warm-Up was exposed to pass completion stats was also the day it realised they were complete bunk. It was some time in the early Premier League era, and some nerd with a spreadsheet revealed that the two best passers in the country were David Batty and Gary Pallister.
So we'll take this one with the pinch of salt it deserves.
(Disclaimer: OK, sure - stats need context, and pass completion isn't a measure of passing ability but rather carefulness in possession. The value of an investment may go down as well as up and you may not get back the money you invested.)
Winks helped Tottenham to a well-earned - and remarkably un-Spursy - 1-1 draw away to Real Madrid that also featured an exceptional goalkeeping display by Hugo Lloris.
Of course, part of Spursiness is looking like you've finally turned the corner, only to crumble at the worst possible moment. But Mauricio Pochettino's side are six points clear of a third-placed Dortmund side who could only draw against APOEL last night.
Good to know that if Spurs do capitulate in the spring, at least they'll do so in the right competition.
Shake sack
To be, or not to be — that is the question. Whether 'tis nobler in the mind to suffer the slings and arrows of outrageous fortune, or to take arms against a sea of troubles, and by opposing end them? To die, to sleep no more; and by a sleep to say we end the heartache, and the thousand natural shocks that flesh is heir to —'tis a consummation devoutly to be wish'd.
The verdict from Leicester City chairman Vichai Srivaddhanaprabha: Not to be.
It is less than a year and a half since Leicester City won the Premier League. You might have heard about it. The Warm-Up won't bore you with the details but it was amazing - Leicester City won the Premier League and everyone agreed it was one of the most extraordinary achievements in football history.
Anyway, they've since binned not one but two managers - Claudio Ranieri who made the miracle happen; and Craig Shakespeare who was a key member of the title-winning coaching staff and who stepped in to dig the Foxes out of a big hole last season.
Shakespeare proved an excellent quick fix, turning around the negative momentum of Ranieri's latter days - but you always felt the three-year contract Leiester gave him came more from a sense of obligation than conviction that he was the man to take the club forward.
Anyway, he isn't any more.
Big Sam is obvs favourite to take the job - with the other contenders representing... well let's just say there's a variety of styles there.
- Sam Allardyce 7/2
- Chris Coleman 5/1
- Carlo Ancelotti 8/1
- Sean Dyche 8/1
- Roberto Mancini 10/1
- Alan Pardew 12/1
(Odds from Oddschecker)
IN OTHER NEWS
Of course Cristiano Ronaldo sings the Champions League anthem.
Slightly silly voice - but Kevin De Bruyne's still got plenty going for him.
And just so you don't accuse us of ignoring Liverpool - here's their 7-0 mauling of Maribor.
HEROES AND ZEROES
HERO: Jean-Kevin Augustin
ZERO: #FakeNews mainstream media
Jose Mourinho is not happy with the media! A couple of days after throwing the suggestion out that he might fancy a move to PSG, he indignantly blamed the press for needlessly reporting the story.
I think you English media have the answer for that because on one day it says I am going to sign a five year contract worth £1bn per season and then the next day you say that I am leaving and going to PSG – I think that is the answer. The answer is that nothing is happening; I am not signing a new five year contract and I am not leaving for PSG.
Poor Jose - all he's trying to do is secure his future and the media keeps twisting his words. After all, what could he possibly have to gain from suggestions he might have other lucrative offers on the table?
RETRO CORNER
Almost as humble as Ronaldo - it's Didier Drogba, tweeting assist compilations of himself.
Pretty good, mind.
COMING UP
More Champions League, including what could either be a cracker or two hours of parked bus as Manchester United visit Benfica - meanwhile Chelsea take on Roma and honestly you fear for Celtic at Bayern Munich.
Jack Lang saw Ederson in the Sao Paulo youth team and knew all along he was going to be great - he's on Thursday's Warm-Up...
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