Europa League final: The Warm-Up, as Chelsea beat Arsenal in Baku

We’ll get to the actual match in a second, but The Warm-Up would just like to state, for the record, that we are 1000% here for Maurizio Sarri now raising a pudgy middle finger to Chelsea, moving to Juventus and winning every title on offer for the next decade.

If ever there was a moment to bow out – preferably by spitting on the ground and muttering “vaffanculo“, then hopping into some vintage car like the climactic scene in an vintage Italo-crime caper – this is surely it. Sarri, the ex-banker whose old job is probably used as rhyming slang by his many detractors, is no longer a trophyless pretender.

And you know what? He doesn’t need any more of this nonsense.

Kepa Arrizabalaga: SEE YA.

Dressing-room factions: SEE YA.

The thousands of Chelsea fans who spent literally the entire season moaning about his every decision, asking for their club back, quoting pass stats like they were a list of crimes: ABSOLUTELY SEE YA.

Chelsea finished third in the Premier League. They reached the final of the League Cup. Last night, they won only the fifth European trophy in their entire history. The Warm-Up isn’t stupid enough to believe everything is perfect, but come on. The broad strokes aren’t bad, are they?

And yet still, his job looks about as secure as a prison made of breadsticks. “At the end of each season you have to sit down and talk,” he said last night. “In my opinion, I deserve to stay at Chelsea. But my opinion is not enough.”

Will Sarri jack it all in? Goodness knows. But he should.

On the one hand, BT Sport’s post-match interview with Eden Hazard didn’t tell us a great deal we didn’t already know. The Belgian quite fancies a bit of Real Madrid, and who can really blame him?

On the other, we at least got to hear it from the horse’s mouth – and see, to some extent, the inner turmoil that comes with leaving a club you love in search of a new challenge. Yes, he had just run around for 90 minutes, but The Warm-Up is pretty sure he’s blushing.

Well done to Hazard for his honesty, and to BT’s Darrell Currie for his (polite) persistance, which eventually yielded the key quote: “I think it is a goodbye.”

Good news for people who don’t like feeling so embarrassed that they want to dig out their lungs with their fingernails: the FA is launching a campaign aimed at rooting out anti-social behaviour at England away matches.

“Don’t Be That Idiot,” they’re calling it, and we can expect an advert featuring both Gareth Southgate and Harry Maguire to hit screens soon.

“It has been a great season for English football and England but we can’t ignore some of the antisocial and embarrassing behaviour that has crept back into the game,” said FA chief executive Martin Glenn.

“There are thousands of brilliant supporters wherever our teams go, but there is an increasing problem that must be called out. We all have a responsibility to represent the country in the right way and that is what we are trying to highlight.”

Let’s hope the flag-waving, racist-chanting, pub-annexing, punch-swinging minority take note.

The Warm-Up’s inaugural Speaking Truth To Power Award goes to the brave soul behind this zingy little exchange with France coach Didier Deschamps:

All together now: Monsieur! With this Rocher, you’re really spoiling us!

Not to labour the point about the appropriateness of Baku as a final host, but this is pretty grim stuff:

This outsider’s view of the UK’s football writing scene – and in particular the lack of access to athletes – is interesting. People are seething about it online, but that’s OK; you don’t have to agree with every sentence.

Oh, and LOL:

Happy birthday to Steven George Gerrard, who turns 39 today. Now let’s hop in the old time machine and go back to 1992, when Gerrard was absolutely dominating matches for his youth team, Whiston Juniors.

This is – from the soundtrack to the explanatory text – is what YouTube was created for:

Another quiet day, although there is one mildly notable fixture on the slate: Turkey vs Greece, aka the Cyprus Clasico, kicks off at 7pm.