The Warm-Up: If Rafa loves Newcastle so much, why doesn't he play himself at the back?
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Updated 16/01/2019 at 08:00 GMT
Plus: Harry Kane is even more injured than we thought; Arsenal's transfer setup is a total shambles; and farewell to Petr Cech.
Newcastle manager Rafa Benitez
Image credit: Getty Images
WEDNESDAY'S BIG STORIES
Who'd be Rafa Benitez?
If Rafa Benitez wants to sign some players, he should put his hand in his pocket and pay for them himself.
This, an apparently irony-free take on Newcastle’s lack of spending in the transfer market.
But the Warm-Up would ignore the ratio on that tweet and go further.
- Programme sales sluggish? Get Rafa out there flogging a few copies!
- Seen the queue for burgers? Be a sport, big man – surely they didn’t call you ‘fat Spanish waiter’ for nothing!
- Four players injured in a cup tie a few days before a relegation six-pointer? Pretty sure it wouldn’t have happened if Benitez had pulled on his rubber gloves and given the medical team a much-needed hand!
Yes, if Rafa didn’t have problems enough, he watched a cup tie against Blackburn spiral from 90 minutes to 210 amid a cataclysmic sequence of injuries.
Ciaran Clark went off with a knock at half-time. His substitute Jamaal Lascelles almost immediately tweaked his hamstring and had to be replaced by Isaac Hayden, who himself limped through extra time. Fabian Schar also ended the night visibly struggling with an injury.
With Paul Dummett, Mo Diame and Jonjo Shelvey already out, Benitez might struggle to name 11 players for Saturday’s crunch game against Cardiff.
Well, Rafa – why not borrow a pair of boots and give yourself a run out at centre-back? After all, management is about teamwork.
On the bright side, Newcastle eventually went through 4-2 after extra time. That earned them a fourth round tie at home to Watford next Saturday. Definitely better than a weekend off and a few days in Dubai, right?
Kane return to coincide with opening of new Spurs stadium
Yesterday’s Warm-Up did a fine job covering the extent to which Harry Kane’s injury leaves Tottenham completely screwed.
Except it turns out they are even more screwed than that.
Kane’s ankle damage is obviously significant – with the club predicting a return to training in early March.
Not to be a downer, but March is also the date the club has set for the opening of their new stadium.
So don’t be surprised if, come Easter, there’s still no sign of Kane because someone’s messed up his wiring.
Arsenal's head of recruitment quits. Of course
Football is a strange and mysterious business. So much happens behind the scenes that we can never hope to comprehend.
For example – why would Sven Mislintat, Arsenal’s head of recruitment, leave just a couple of days after Unai Emery said the club wouldn’t do any recruiting this month?
In fairness, there is more to it. It seems Mislintat’s influence has shrunk since the departure of chief executive Ivan Gazidis in September, and will be overlooked for a new technical director role. (The Warm-Up knows this because David Ornstein said so.)
So yeah, if anyone thought Arsene Wenger’s departure would herald a new era of lavish transfer spending... think again.
IN OTHER NEWS
HEROES AND ZEROES
Hero: Petr Cech
There aren’t many players who have spent 15 years at two rival London clubs, and are still viewed affectionately by fans of both. Cech was a great goalkeeper, and seems an excellent bloke. And seeing as we’ve clogged up Retro Corner with something from a video game, here’s the big guy’s finest moment.
Zeroes: Stoke City
2-0 up against lower-league opposition with 20 minutes to go... and Stoke somehow lost 3-2 at home to Shrewsbury in the FA Cup. Congratulations to Shrewsbury on a superb comeback, of course... but still, that’s quite the capitulation.
Official accounts’ deadpan reporting of bad news always amuses the Warm-Up – here’s a good example, with only ‘completely free’ betraying the admin’s utter disbelief at what they are seeing.
RETRO CORNER
We rarely get misty-eyed about brands interacting with footballers – and with good reason - but the Petr Cech-FIFA episode still raises a smile.
It started when Cech appeared in contract negotiation cut scenes wearing his scrum cap...
HAT TIP
It’s Thierry Henry versus Patrick Vieira tonight as the pair face off as managers for the first time. Here’s the Guardian’s Nick Ames on Monaco-Nice.
COMING UP
Did you not read the bit above? It’s Monaco-Nice.
We’re liveblogging Real Madrid’s Copa del Rey escapades against Leganes and there’s FA Cup doings in Southampton’s replay against Derby.
Jack Lang loves the Warm-Up so much he has paid personally for the pixels in Thursday's edition
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