Women's Champions League: Barcelona Femini are the best football team in the world - The Warm-Up
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Updated 31/03/2022 at 08:03 GMT
90,000 people partied as Barcelona dismantled Real Madrid in the Women's Champions League; as the most dominant team in world football lived up to their reputation. And qualification for Qatar 2022 is over, almost, which means it's time to start worrying about the group stages. Meanwhile, the Premier League has decided to give Pep Guardiola what he wants.
Alexia Putellas of FC Barcelona celebrates with the fans after the UEFA Women's Champions League Quarter Final Second Leg match between FC Barcelona and Real Madrid at on March 30, 2022 in Barcelona
Image credit: Getty Images
THURSDAY'S BIG STORIES
Dedication's What You Need
It's a cruel thing, hope. Just as they had in the first leg, Real Madrid took the lead over Barcelona last night. And, just as in the first leg, they got roundly punished for it. The comeback was on, the Camp Nou was silenced, the competition was — oh, Barcelona have scored. Oh, Barcelona have scored again. And again. And again.
From 2-1 down to 5-2 up in just over 20 minutes. You could call it brutal; you could call it, on the balance of play, fair enough.
That Barcelona Femení were better than their opponents is, by now, almost a given. They won because they always win, because they are better, and just provoking the thought "hang on" is more than most opponents manage. But when 90,000 people turn up to watch, the occasion demands a little narrative shape. All noises seem louder after a moment of silence.
And the Camp Nou was loud. The game sold out in four days, and the official attendance of 91,553 is being hailed as a record for a women's football game. This is a little peculiar, given that the attendance for the final of the 1971 World Cup, Denmark against Mexico in the Azteca Stadium, is recorded as somewhere around 110,000. But that tournament came under the auspices of the Federation of Independent European Female Football, 20 years before FIFA's first women's World Cup and 11 years before UEFA's first Euros. There is an inconvenient history being quietly downplayed here; a present erasure of erasures past.
But last night definitely set a record for a club game in Europe. It was an occasion decades in the making, and yet you kind of suspect it might be beaten come April and the semi-finals. Certainly, it's hard to imagine anybody leaving the ground last night and not immediately wanting to come back and experience it all over again.
Well, except perhaps the other lot. Madrid, for all that they contrived to lead, briefly, were comprehensively dismantled; there is a 28-point gap between the two teams in the Primera Division standings, and you could see it as Barcelona moved the ball around, moved the opposition around; as they made spaces and then flowed into them. Another win, then, for this team that doesn't do anything else. And an occasion that went beyond just a big game, into something celebratory, something carnival. A special night for a special team. Madrid got thumped, and so did the drums.
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Barcelona players celebrate
Image credit: Getty Images
While You Were Sleeping
The 2022 World Cup is almost full. CONCACAF qualification wrapped up early this morning — Canada, Mexico, USA through; Costa Rica to the playoffs — and so we know 29 of 32 teams. But the draw doesn't happen until tomorrow, which means we're currently at the mercy of the strongest and strangest force in football: our own stupid imagination.
When you think about it, it's remarkable how much time is spent, as a football follower, imagining how things might go. Every transfer rumour is a window into a possible future; every minute before the teamsheet comes out is a minute spent in fantasy land. They won't? They could. They should. Like a gas, the imagination expands to fill all available space. No wonder reality is so often a little bit underwhelming.
Take England, safe and secure in Pot 1. There's the possibility of Germany, a doom-laden reminder of miseries past; there's also the possibility of the USA, a chance for the press to get all giddy, run the 2010 playbook, and jinx the whole adventure before it even begins. The draw is random but the mind plays tricks: whatever happens will feel like it had to happen.
Maybe it's the presence of Qatar in Pot 1, or maybe it's just that international football feels pretty strong at the moment, but there seems a very high potential for awkwardness. Pot 2 — that's the Netherlands, Denmark, Mexico, Germany, the USA, Switzerland, Uruguay and Croatia — contains more banana skins than Donkey Kong's compost. And then Senegal, Poland, Japan and South Korea are lurking down there in Pot 3. And if, and then, and what about, and perhaps.
Also it's important to avoid the winner of AFC Fourth Round vs. Peru. Nothing is so scary as the unknown.
This moment, with the qualification (almost) done but the groups not yet drawn, is perhaps the most potent and overwhelming of the entire international calendar. Every team is simultaneously in the Group of Death, the Group of Serious Illness, the Group of Feeling Quite Chipper, Actually, and the Group of Out For An Early Morning Jog. Find yourself a draw simulator, hammer the buttons, and relax (or not) into a world that might come to pass.
Unlevelling The Playing Field
Exciting news coming up at some point today, assuming reports are correct. The Premier League will vote to return to five substitutions per game as of next season. Like you, like the Warm-Up, the Premier League's decision makers are desperate to see all they can of Donny van de Beek before he eventually escapes to somewhere a little more sensible.
Good news? Certainly, if you're a hamstring. And you can sort of see, abstractly, how players might not be the only winners here. Give a manager five changes and you give them license to try things: an early change if something unexpected is happening; a mass change of plan late on. Some poor, desperate schmuck is going to make all five changes at half-time, and that is going to be a wonderful day. Look at them, all lined up.
But like money — in fact, because of money — good news is never distributed equally. This is better news for anybody with bigger and deeper squads; which is to say, the usual suspects up there at the top of the table. Imagine having all those beautiful players carefully stockpiled away, and only being able to use 14 of them on any given Saturday. Such inconvenience, such indignity.
This will bring the Premier League in line with European and domestic cup competitions, which will at least stop the Warm-Up getting confused when we're half-watching something and a fourth sub happens. It will also make Pep Guardiola and Jurgen Klopp both happy, a heartwarming hands-across-the-divide moment. Though quite why Guardiola is so keen on this rule change isn't clear: he barely uses the subs he's already allowed. Or maybe that's the point. Not using three subs must feel pretty powerful, when you've an entire nation state behind you. Not using five? What a buzz.
IN OTHER NEWS
Fine, this happened on Tuesday, but you might have missed it. And you don't want to have missed it. Look at it. Look at how little time he has, look at the paltry backlift, look at him barely kick the thing. Look at the ball take off. That's a 18-yard curling crashing top-corner tap-in. He's ridiculous. He's beyond ridiculous. He's a cheat code.
HAT TIP
After Barcelona Femení's dismantling of Real Madrid, who better to hear from than midfielder Ingrid Engen and general manager Markel Zubizarreta? Sid Lowe spoke to the pair of them before last night's game, which is why the piece doesn't contain quite as much uncontrollable laughter as one might expect.
Barcelona have won 75 of their past 78 games, yet this starts with defeat, or so the story goes. They were at the airport waiting fly home from the 2019 Champions League final, where they were defeated by Lyon, when the players approached the then coach Lluís Cortés and demanded to do whatever it took. In the words of the then captain Vicky Losada, that meant more … everything. Unfortunate to lose the semi-final the following season, they were victorious in Gothenburg last year. It had been coming.
OTHER HAT TIP
How much time have you spent trying to work out England's likely squad for Qatar 2022? Pah, you are like a little baby. Over at the i, Daniel Storey has run through the 55 — that's fifty-five — definites, probables, possibles and fringe candidates that he reckons Gareth Southgate has given some thought to. Can't believe he missed him out, though. You know who we mean.
And if you're bored at work, why not try to guess the names before you click on the link? Here's one for free.
Jordan Pickford: Still England’s No. 1, even before Aaron Ramsdale pulled out of this squad. Whatever you think about the lengths of his arms at club level, he’s basically never let Gareth Southgate down.
COMING UP
Two more Women's Champions League quarter-finals tonight, both exquisitely poised. Arsenal travel to Wolfsburg with the tie deadlocked at 1-1, then plucky upstarts Juventus take a 2-1 lead to Lyon.
And Andi Thomas will be back with you tomorrow.
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